1. When the network newscasters announce who won Florida, what little self-effacing phrase will they use to introduce it? “We’re ready to announce a winner in Florida, and believe me, this time we’ve checked our numbers and counted them twice…”? “We are calling Florida for Bush/Kerry, although with Florida the only thing you can expect is the unexpected…”? What’s it going to be?
2. If one were to serve a house drink on Election Night, what should it be?
a. Suggest existing appropriate drinks for Bush supporters and for Kerry supporters.
b. Create your own drink and describe what’s in it. E.g., for pessimistic Kerry supporters, you might suggest the Bush Oblivion (“take three a day for the next four years”) . Or, Kerry supporters might drink Iraq Invasions: Mix together wild turkey and WMDs; if no WMDs can be found, substitute zero-proof beer. Bush supporters might prefer the Shock and Awe.
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