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Help me be interesting

AKMA thinks it says something about his family that two weekends ago his family went to see A Prairie Home Companion and this past weekend they saw An Inconvenient Truth.

I can’t speak for AKMA’s family, but those were the last two movies I saw and, yes, it says everything you need to know about me. I am 100% stereotypical. If you know one thing I believe, you know everything I believe.

So, I’m thinking of developing a quirky belief. Something out of left field, so to speak. Something that will make me memorable and give me something to talk about beyond the usual “I know, and what’s even more appalling about ‘President’ Bush is…”

For conversational purposes, the quirky belief has to have some quirky reason I believe it. I’m thinking about:

Favoring capital punishment. Not for revenge or deterrence but because “a society that can’t kill, can’t love.” Supporting the Star Wars missile interception program because the R&D might prove crucial in preventing the spread of avian flu: “Imagine a flock of infected swallows flying over our southern border…”

Opposing gay marriage because “homosexual promiscuity is the last reminder that freedom is the joy of sex.” Opposing animal rights because “rights result from verbal contracts, and ‘Bow-wow’ isn’t recognized as a binding contract in any court in the Union.”

Supporting nuclear power “because the possibility of melt-downs and the dangers of storing nuclear waste remind us that life is composed of risks both acute and chronic. No place to hide, baby.” Supporting drilling in Alaska as a declaration of our species’ commitment to winning The War on the Wilderness.

I’m not saying these make sense. I’m just saying they’d make me interesting. And believe me, I could use some of that.

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10 Responses to “Help me be interesting”

  1. Perhaps you should play Advocacy.

  2. Before you start going down the contrarian liberal-yet-strangely-reactionary route (not that I think you’re serious or anything) do some googling on ‘Spiked Online’, the ‘Institute of Ideas’ and the Revolutionary Communist Party. And be afraid.

  3. There was a time, when I was young, that I thought life was boring, but having been over that tattered edge of reality a few too many times, I tend to cling to normality.

    Here is my argument against current convention. It’s a little long, but it is different;

    I would like to point out two errors at the base of modern logic.

    The first is that geometry never incorporated the zero. Geometry starts with the point, which is a virtual one, not an actual zero. Consider that points, lines and planes have a zero dimension. Well, 2x2x0=0. What they really have is a virtual dimension. While a point might not have any dimension, it is still a specific point of reference. A real zero in geometry would be empty space, ie. the potential for any point, not a specific one. Also, three dimensions are a specific coordinate system, not space itself. Any number of coordinate systems, starting from any point, can be used to define the same space, so while any particular map of space may be three dimensional, the actual territory of space is infinitely dimensional. What this means is that while geometry defines space, it does not create it.

    The other issue is that time has two directions. The observer’s arrow of time goes from past events to future events. On the other hand, these events go from being in the future to being in the past, so the arrow of time for the observed goes from future to past.

    Time isn’t a dimension because the frame of reference does not constitute an absolute against which the point of reference transcribes another dimension. It is a process in which the point and frame move relative to their respective influence on one another. Content and context go in opposite directions. To the hands of the clock, it is the face going counterclockwise.

    The unit of time goes from beginning to end, but the process of time is going toward the beginning of the next, leaving the old. A day is measured by the sun rising in the east and setting in the west, but the reality is the earth is rotating the other direction.

    Think of a factory; The product moves from initiation to completion, but the production line faces the other way, with its mouth consuming raw materials and finished product being expelled.

    Our lives are units of time going from beginning to end, while the process of living goes on to the next generation, shedding the old like dead skin.

    This relationship of the process and the unit is one of perspective. A unit at one level is a process at another and vice versa.

    These bottom up processes and the top down entities they create and which then define them are all around us. Democracy is a process. The Republic is an entity. Capitalism is a process. The corporation is an entity. Russian communism failed because it tried to take the process of the economy and turn it into a single unit. Chinese communism has so far succeeded because it has turned itself into the worlds largest corporation.

    Reality consists of energy recording information. As the amount of energy remains the same, old information is erased as new is recorded. This information is a product of relationships of the manifest energy. The only absolute frame is the present, so any action is balanced by an “equal and opposite” reaction. Objective reality is the energy. Time is only a function of the subjective information. “Past” and “future” do not exist because the energy to manifest them is currently tied up in the present. Time travel would require speeding up or reversing the entire universe.

    Time is not so much a projection out from the present event, as it is a coming together of factors to define what is present. The past is the influences which define current order and the future is the energy which will motivate that order. When this order is an open set, it absorbs fresh energy, defining it, so the future is a continuation of the past. When the order is a closed set, the energy accumulates in open spaces and the future becomes a reaction to the past. Evolution and revolution.

    By defining reality as three dimensional space, with a linear graph of time as a fourth dimension, we are using the individual point of reference as the basis for explaining reality, when a more objective explanation requires understanding how any number of such points interact.

    Temperature is another method for measuring motion, that of a level of activity against a prevailing scale. At the atomic level, the concept of temperature is meaningless, as it is individual atoms moving in context. On the human level, government economic statistics are a form of temperature reading, that of a level of activity against its prevailing scale.

    To the individual, time is a primary concern, as past and future are the path we’ve traveled and the pitfalls and rewards ahead. Now we are not all traveling along the same path, but are expending and absorbing energy in the same reality. To the mass of humanity, concepts related to the fluctuations of activity, such as the social and economic expansion of liberalism, or the civil and economic consolidation of conservatism, are of more consequence then specifically remembering the past, or planning for the future. Temperature, rather then time, is a more relevant concept for political activity. While particular movements have their own historical perspective, consideration for the past and concern for the future don’t have the larger political resonance one would assume they should.

    What of our religious assumptions? We have this narrative story about a spiritual entity leading humanity forward. The notion of God started out as a personification of the tribal soul and anthropomorphization of the elements of nature. Three thousand years ago, it was cutting edge logic to combine all these manifestations into one.

    The problem is that one isn’t the absolute, zero is. The medium and median are essence we rise from, not a focal point from which we fell. A spiritual absolute wouldn’t be a singular entity, definable quantity or extreme, but, like zero, both void and center.

    An all-knowing absolute is a contradiction. The absolute has no distinctions, while knowledge is an endless process of distinction and judgment. Consciousness and knowledge are not synonymous. One is source, the other is process. The Christian trinity is an apt metaphor; Father, Son, Holy Ghost. Absolute, extant, infinite. Past, present, future. Order, complexity, chaos.

    Good and bad are not a metaphysical dual between between the forces of light and darkness, but the binary code for conscious decision. A bottom up accumulation of billions of years of biological yes/no, on/off, I/O.

    For the process, good and bad are relative. What is good for the fox, is bad for the chicken. For the individual, such distinctions may as well be absolute, at least for the chicken.

    The moral argument for monotheism is that belief in God instills respect for law and order. I would like to point out that the natural tendency to identify ones own soul as an expression of God sometimes results in the impression that ones natural impulses are potentially infallible. Our current President would be a prime example. If we were instead to view that source of consciousness as the essence of which we are all striving, yet fallible expressions of, then the more natural tendency might be to think before we act.

    All of reality is both absolute and infinite, but when you separate out one point of reference, it is all relative to that point. This is what makes our individuality so overwhelming. We overcome that enormity by focusing on the details of living and this ties us back to the larger whole.

    The reason life seems meaningless is because the concept of ‘meaning’ is static and reductionistic, while life is dynamic and holistic. It is when we distill away all that seems transitory about life, searching for that hard little nugget of value, that we have lost all we threw away and have so little to show for it. Everything has purpose. That is what ties it all together.

    There is a time in one’s life when the father goes from being the model one follows, to the foundation one rises from. I think humanity is nearing that point.



  4. (whew… hard act to follow, especially with this simple, yet perhaps relevant thought):

    Support the constitutional amendment outlawing flag burning on the grounds that overarching gestures for national unity aren’t exclusively in the purview of anti-intellectual, reactionary, knuckle-dragging, slack-jawed, drooling, beady-eyed bigots; but rather that progressives too can be patriotic and enjoy a slice of apple pie.

  5. What about taking up pipe-smoking?

  6. Couldn’t you just get a funny hat?

  7. No, cause I beat him to that one.

  8. If you’re bulking up on your evil-dude bwa-ha-ha factor, you may be in the market for a Blogging Archenemy. For a small fee….

  9. Ignoring the previous posts with their overreaching (and even existential) concepts, you don’t have to be radical, contrarian, or even Rush Limbaugh. You just have to be startling. Find an aphorism which puts current practices into an unexpected perspective. My pitiful examples:
    Democrats want to lose or they’d have a plan;
    If the Big Dig had been allowed a few more weeks they’d have hit oil (local impact);
    We need new air pollution which can counterbalance previous air pollution;
    Older people move to rural areas to die (This one had to be explained to me; my neighbor meant that by moving up here where medical care is 45 minutes away by ambulance (after they pick you up an hour after you call), you probably aren’t gonna make it when the Big One hits.);
    When LA moves offshore, there’ll be more beachfront property to sell;
    Roswell doesn’t have all the aliens;
    Economic refugees (sometimes called illegal aliens) like living 10 to a mobile home kinda like homeless people like living in the rain and snow;
    Weasel poop coffee IS better (factually based Dave Barry column);
    Borrowing money to continue our lifestyle isn’t imprudent since the Rapture will make it all moot.

    Lame. But you get my point. Excelsior.

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