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Tuesday night scorecard

Ted Kennedy: The speech a monument — and the best Senator in history — would give.

Howard Dean: That afternoon when talking to 1,000 screamiac supporters, he let loose and reminded us why we stood in the snow for him. For the speech to the Convention I would only have stood in light hail.

Barack Obama: The good news for Hillary is that she might get State Department when Obama is President in 2012.

Ron Reagan: Good to hear about this adminisration’s embrace of medieval science from Reagan’s bad boy. A staid presentation, but every degree of passion would have been taken as a sign of a kink in his psychology.

Ilana Wexler, the twelve year old: Conventions should have a “You must be taller than this to ride” sign on the podium because it’s so rare that trotting out a kid — no matter how wholesome, enthusiastic and charming — can make it over the tackiness hurdle. I don’t know if Ilana did because the frequency of her amplified voice was above my hearing range. (Seriously.)

Teresa Heinz Kerry: He talk was literate and artfully constructed, but was the point to prove that she’s too intelligent to raise her voice? Even so, I thought there was a bit of the “Shove it” Teresa in the multi-lingual opening: Juggling while unicycling, saying, “Yo, Bushes, let’s see you do this!” Nevertheless, I’m a total sucker for appeals to new Americans. Does anyone love our country more?

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